I fear the future, the change, the loss, and even the gains. I have become comfortable right here where I am at 107 L berry Lane. At the age of 21 years, I feel like I am supposed to be building this great large foundation for the ladder part of my life. Why? I am happy. Who made the rule to work hard and then play later? How far is later? Like later in life? Or later in the day? For me, now is later in the day, and maybe sometimes later in the week. How come I feel this pressure like I’m in a sack being eaten up by the future? I’m slowly getting withered away every day that progresses.
I fear the loss of family and friends in the future. Every day I get older, every day they get older but… they are already older. This fear has consumed me because I want to put every minute and every second in a jar and hold it in my hand till I’m ready to let go. Cheesy, I know but do I fear the future because I am so happy with the present? Do you fear the future because of the present is so good to you?
Maybe some day I will hate my present life and will embrace and wish for the future. Take that as an example, some day…that’s the future… that’s not now. Then I have to ask the question, because I’m so happy now, will I wish for the past when I’m in the future? Have I set my happy bar too high?
According to several Goofy Science People, we are close to curing aging. And once you stop aging, all you have to do is not get murdered or die by accident and wait for age reversal to work. Then you can stay 21 or so at 107 L Berry Lane forever. Same goes for your family and friends! And when you get bored/hate your life, there will be some technology to let you move on. But who says stagnation is a bad thing?
ReplyDeleteIt only gets more intense with age, bro. I've learned that the more I focus on these types of worries, the more I FOCUS ON THESE TYPES OF WORRIES! Anyway, best to just live it and not think about it, I guess.
ReplyDelete"Every day I get older, they get older... but they are already old." Wow. That statement really gets to me. It's something that I fear as well with my parents and grandparents. Sometimes I do wish that everyone I know, including myself, could simply stop aging and stay happily where they are.
ReplyDeleteSave this post, tuck it away somewhere. Then every ten years, read it again...you will find it still holds true, yet ten years have passed anyway. Like John said, just live life and time will happen, always has, always will.
ReplyDeleteI really like the tension created here with fear and comfort along with your list of questions. A very reflective post.
There are constants with growing up and getting older. One..we all fear the future on some level. It's human nature to fear the unknown. Second...when you're older you will always look back on the happy days you've had. Time only moves forward, you can't go back again. I've tried.
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